YogaTalk

Practical reminders for ordinary splendour

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SILLINESS

After a couple of very serious blogs, I found myself thinking I need to bring a little silliness into my day. Not tricky for me. I love a little silliness. I may have mentioned before, and often say this in the yoga class when faced with many serious and sombre faces looking back at me, “There is just not enough silliness in this world”.

I believe we have become too grown up and forgotten the freedom of our childish and innocent ways.

I love a little humour, in fact, I love a lot of humour. Within most of my daily tasks I inject some witty comments or ridicule (usually of myself) and laughter.

I love a giggly yoga class. I can find myself giving the instruction to lift the corners of the mouth – the reaction of my students never fails to amuse me as it dawns on them that I am asking them to smile. It always creates a chuckle or two. The joyous reaction of having a good old roll around in happy baby (Ananda Balasana) can lift the mood on a rainy day. We can take ourselves too seriously can’t we? Laughter is great therapy.

I attended a meditation session recently. It was all very reverent, lots of delightful chanting and serious nodding of approval. The last chant got underway – all very lovely – but the tune seemed to be turning a little ‘country and western’!!! When it was over, choosing her words carefully, my friend kindly pointed out that it was more like a rendition of ‘ You picked a fine time to leave me Lucille’. The place enjoyed minutes of uproarious laughter and fun. The session ended with lots of love and smiles all round.

If you haven’t already, go and create a little silliness in your day…. Then smile and be joyous that you did.

Love and silliness – Joy 🙂

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JUDGEMENT

Why do we do it? There’s no denying it! We judge ourselves for our actions, we judge our partners and friends for theirs, we even judge those who we don’t even know. We say they’re too fat, too thin, too brown, too silly, and so on and so on…..

As discerning human beings with opinions and intellect we constantly make decisions and choices. It’s part of who we are. Decisions are an important part of everyday living. We live better lives because of them….or do we?

Sometimes our inner decision-making skills are off kilter, for all sorts of reasons. We forget to ask ourselves why we feel something is better for us. We find ourselves caught up in wanting to make decisions and choices for others because it’s our own preference, not theirs. We justify it by saying “It’s for their own good” or, “I know what’s best for them”. Effectively taking away the power to make decisions for themselves. I pose the question – Should we do this?

No doubt, there are times to look after our children or loved ones that are in need of care. But being lost to the capability of keeping themselves safe enables us to take on the role of ‘keeper’ or ‘parent’. When we notice changes occur and they are stronger and more capable, we can choose to back off from our temporary role.

As the receiver of this kindness we may begin to rely on others to take care of all our decisions, becoming less responsible for our own actions and happy to pass on this mantle to anyone who will accept it for us.

As the giver do we feel comfortable to continue to fulfil a desire in us that makes us feel needed, unaware that we are taking someone’s independence away from them – albeit with their blessing and consent, even their gratitude.

It can become obvious in the yoga class. A regular cue of mine is to take things easy, not doing anything that doesn’t feel appropriate or backing off when the body decides it has had enough. In truth, few people are aware of their bodies and what they need or feel. They are mostly happy to push through a degree of pain in order to achieve what the teacher is asking of them. In other words, ‘Let the teacher decide what’s good for me’ – opting out of taking the decision to be responsible for themselves.

There is no better reward as a teacher to see a dozen different students doing a dozen different things from the same instructions – all of them independently aware that their bodies are requiring something slightly different at that moment in time – without competition or enquiry. Not so much on other occasions.

The yoga class is the perfect environment to get in touch with the responses and reactions of the body and mind. To be aware that the mind and all its chatter can be so bossy it takes over and doesn’t always allow us to feel what’s best for us. It makes us compete with ourselves and others. It makes a poor judgement call, feeding the ego rather than the soul. We can use the term ‘Ahimsa’ (Sanskrit for non-harming or non-violence) to bring our awareness back to the relevance of the here and now, empowering us to make the best judgment call for ourselves. To know that judging others or making judgment calls for them is not always the kindest thing to do. In practicing Ahimsa and awareness we can be in a more informed place to decide what’s best for us. By example, help those close to us to be responsible for their own decisions, supporting their choices to encourage confidence and personal growth.

The reward may not be as instant but over time it’s a win/win. We then have confident and well-adjusted family and friends around us to support us to make our own choices when we face challenges, rather than make poor decisions for us.

I hope this blog has been as thought provoking for you as it has for me. Giving ourselves space for thought before we rush in and inadvertently force our judgment on others may be one of the kindest ways of practicing our yoga off the mat.

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TICKETTYBOO!

Here are some thoughts about feeling fine with our here and now… which as it happens, is the yogic concept of santosha. What does this mean, and how can it be useful?

Santosha/samtosa/santosh/santosa is something of a pause… a way of taking in how we are, so we can then respond well to whatever’s happening at the time.

Sanskrit words don’t always seem to have obvious English equivalents, which can cause misunderstanding.

‘Santosha’ comes from san meaning completely or entirely, and tosha meaning acceptance or contentment. The concept is not however about resignation or passive fatalism. Santosha is a practical means for positive change.

Santosha concerns noticing the interplay between our present moments, thoughts and feelings: and how they then influence our subsequent responses and decisions.

It helps us see ourselves and our circumstances more clearly, free from misapprehension and self-deception. This allows us to make wiser choices about the direction we take – knowing how and where we are gives us a clear starting point.

The clarity which santosha brings comes from letting go of fears, which cloud our judgement.

Yoga considers that human nature is essentially happy, but irrational fears can sap this joy, commonly leading to suffering.

Fears can root us to the spot, making us hold on too tightly. They can make us defensive. They can make us want to flee. They can fuel an urge to try and control things. But the only thing I can really control is… me.

But when anxious, we’re hardly going to self-manage well!

Santosha helps ground us in the present moment, reducing anxiety about future situations – which may or may not materialise. We’re then more likely to make wiser decisions, with positive outcomes. Then, the future will seem brighter and we’re less likely to cause pain – to us or others.

Through santosha I feel at ease with myself, more fearless and clear-sighted, less wrapped up in my own needs – more likely to manage myself both unselfishly and well.

It feels like a relief to me, very much a physical sensation… a soft exhale through the mouth, a letting go of any struggles, as if making room to breathe more wisdom in…

The smell of gorse or juniper; the sound of boots crunching on sparkly snow; lying on the grass admiring passing clouds; the scent of lilac and the colour of the flowers; the roar of Tarn Beck on a hot day before plunging in; sitting in timeless meditation.

A sense of peace, and release… not having to bother trying to control the uncontrollable.

Life comes in waves of change. Highs and lows, joys and sorrows, all are part of living. Nothing ever stays the same.

Santosha helps us to embrace life, to handle change, reducing the desire to escape, or to keep things the same. Less wishing we were in a different time or place. Less yearning for sensory pleasures. Less thinking, ‘I’ll be happy when…’

As I get older I notice more how the Fridays seem to come round ever quicker.

Awareness of time passing, the faculty of memory, knowing that there is a future: all are part of being human. I think of santosha as a friend… who offers timely reminders if I’m missing too many precious present moments by dwelling in the past or wishing my life away.

If I know how to restore my equilibrium, I’m not so troubled when I notice my mind ‘doing its thing’: chattering away about what will happen tomorrow or what happened yesterday!

As santosha has come to feel more familiar, I’m able to cultivate it consciously when it doesn’t come unbidden.

And so, like many other yoga concepts, it’s a simple, useful, practical and powerful tool.

Why not take a few minutes now to sense it yourself…

Rest your hands

Let go of any tensions

Exhale softly and deeply through the mouth

Imagine yourself stepping back, to see the bigger picture, to notice your feelings about the here now.

Picture yourself feeling peaceful and fearless.

Breathe in endless possibilities and positive change.

Close your eyes and settle into the moment

On these pleasant spring mornings I often breakfast very early, on the swing bench at the back of the garden. Sometimes santosha creeps up on me, and I hear the birds sing to me: ‘Enjoy!’ ‘Enjoy!’ ‘Enjoy!’

So I do!

 

 

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BLOG

NEW BEGINNINGS

Here are some thoughts about habits, followed by a few simple ideas for how to make more good ones… and break the bad.

Chatting before class recently I remarked that we can make yoga practices out of many everyday things, and someone said…“Then I’m going to make a practice out of drinking gin!”

And yes, I suppose we could do such a thing, if only to appreciate it more and to better notice how much we’re actually drinking.

Whilst it made us laugh it also reminds me how sticky it is to navigate a course through life… when even overdoing the healthy things can ultimately cause harm!

This is when our yoga helps us recover an even keel and strike a better balance: for strength and flexibility both physically and mentally, being able to flex and not snap under strain, to think more clearly… and do things differently.

Our habits are as wide-ranging and individual as our nervous tics. It’s useful to be made more aware of them. Are they helpful? What influences these things we do so regularly that they’ve unconsciously ‘set in’, and we seem unable to manage without them?

Our brain is continuously making decisions on all kinds of levels. Don’t they say that conscious awareness is just 5% of the brain’s activity? Meaning that the other 95% is happening below our radar!

We can function easily on autopilot. It’s one reason for our species’ success – this ability to do one thing whilst consciously thinking about something else!

Being spared conscious involvement in mundane tasks frees up our brain for other things.

But freedom goes and troubles come when we’re unable to self-manage well. We can easily become confined by unhelpful habits and the old routines, living too much on auto – at the expense of self-awareness.

Making practices out of regular daily actions helps keep us fresh and wide-awake to our experience of living. Why not help restore the curiosity of our childlike self, unafraid to question everything? I mean not just our individual habits, but those which societies cultivate collectively.

Long-standing routines and religious or cultural traditions can certainly bring comfort and reassurance. Doing familiar things can sometimes steady us, making structure from life’s uncertainty and chaos. But we also benefit from nurturing our more attuned awareness.

Our life is such a sensory experience. We’re definitely pleasure seekers – beyond doubt! It’s just that some things are so enticing… and when caught up by moments of temptation we tend to forget that short-term gratification can lead to long-term pain.

Yes, we all have internal tussles. And with pleasure as a catalyst, trouble can easily brew.

I was reminded recently of something I too easily overlook… that emotion, not rational thought, is what drives even our unconscious decisions.

Humanity is beset by addiction, and with so many enticing things out there the problem seems to be growing.

But where once most addictions were for some food, drink or substances, now they are more likely to be behaviours; timeless ones like obsessive hoarding, cleaning, gambling, checking… and now with the additional modern examples such as: online gaming, binge viewing, social media, using mobile devices, checking texts and emails, or online ‘likes’.

It’s easy to see how people get stuck in their debilitating habits and behaviours. Maybe we hold on too tight because we fear change or letting go? Maybe we’re stagnating through inertia, apathy even, unable to think differently and move on? Imagine the false comfort of using a walking stick, long after a leg has healed.

But on a positive note: whilst it’s easy to drag ourselves down, we can also drag ourselves back up again – by knowing how to give things a ‘yoga-turn’. This means being unafraid and even amused to see all we do in a clearer, more kindly light. It takes all kinds to make our rich and diverse world.

Knowing how to self-help in a positive way is a purpose and cornerstone of yoga practice. We’re already acutely self-aware-emotive creatures. Yoga is about nurturing an awareness which is benign, beneficial, powerful and positive.

We’re each unique. Is there really such a thing as ‘normal’? What I regularly do is my ‘normal’, but to someone else… it may be just ‘weird’???

HERE ARE SOME HINTS ON HABITS:

Self-observe

Cultivate a skill in self-observation. Simply notice personal routines and habits, so we can distinguish between the benign, useless, harmful and helpful.

Try to spot influences and associations concerning particular habits, such as people, places, situations, moods and mind-frame.

Some ill-serving habits are less consequential, but some can cause great suffering for a person and those around them.

Decide

Recognise what change is needed. Are you breaking a bad habit? Making a new and positive routine? All of this? Choose your path and make a plan.

Set realistic goals and manageable timelines… half a day of doing this, three hours of not doing that… until the hours extend to days.

 

Visualise

Picture the future you. Imagine your life and how you will be with this new routine or when free of that particular habit. Bring this picture to your mind’s eye on a regular basis, especially when temptation is strong – until it passes. It will pass… everything passes.

 

Clarity

Aim to be free of self-deception. Have courage and be fearless in having definite goals. Are you adopting something new? Managing something? Giving something up completely?

Use tactics

Seek out situations which consolidate a new and positive routine. Avoid people or places you associate with bad habits. Schedule in new well-serving habits. Tag them onto existing routines – like going swimming on the way to work.

Keep trying

Long-standing bad habits are very difficult to shift; they’re persistent. Don’t give up when you slip up. Just start again.

Willpower gets depleted more easily at times of stress and strain. Resting helps renew it; like a muscle it gets stronger with regular exercise, which starts to seem easier.

Procrastination

While it’s true that good timing can help make or break a habit, it’s also true that the best time to start afresh is sometimes… NOW.

It’s your call to recognise which is the wiser deed – don’t delay or put off taking action when you know you’re falling back on excuses.

Accept support

Be unafraid to share your journey with those you trust. Be a good receiver of support. Be prepared to seek medical help. A burden is lighter when shared.

Patience and kindness

Practise self-compassion. Change can’t always happen overnight; adjusting behaviour patterns is rarely instant. If a stiff body has been sitting slumped for years, even the greatest will in the world can’t make it sit instantly upright.

Look after yourself

Value yourself. Focus on the healthy-living you. Incentivise yourself – give yourself credit and treat yourself well. Get plenty of rest – the world can seem a better place after a good night’s sleep.

Each moment that passes adopts the sense of a new beginning if we choose it to be so. For most of us the absence of awareness allows the mundane and habitual process to creep in, eventually setting the tone of our daily existence to the detriment of pleasure and freedom of thought and action. A balance of security and safety of everyday stuff coupled with excitement and autonomy to make alternative choices is surely one of the gifts of human intelligence. Having the confidence to delight in our very existence and ‘ring the changes’ can significantly enrich our lives…. If only we could recognise these choices are ours to make!!

 

 

 

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PRACTICE

SOUNDSCAPE

Most of us are blessed to hear the unique sounds of our daily living; but being used to it makes it easier to miss it.

We can make a practice of listening to sounds which happen to be around at the time. Stopping to do this on a regular basis can help make us feel connected to our surroundings, more at ease and embodied in the world.

Anytime can be a good time. Why not try it now?

Drop your shoulders and allow the breath to soften.

Relax the eyes, then close them.

Feel happy to pause from action, resting for a few minutes just to listen.

Let your other senses begin to take a back seat, as you tune-in to any sounds or apparent silence…

Let your ears be open to listening without trying, soaking up sounds in general, but nothing in particular.

Imagine your ears and eyes are smiling, with any tension in your neck or face just melting.

Become immersed in all these sounds together. Notice layers of volume, frequency, rhythm and texture.

But can you listen in a neutral way? Is it possible to simply not be bothered by any sounds which feel intrusive?

If you hear people talking close by, make a game of not homing in to conversation content. Listen as if it were an unfamiliar language; notice rather the manner of their talking, the level of friendliness in their interaction.

Then, focus on just one sound in particular. And give this your full attention, remain this way for some moments, just listening…

If there are other sounds, then pick out a different one… as if hearing it for the first time.

Continue this for as long as you like, hopping from sound… to… sound.

When you feel it’s nearing time to close the practice… breathe deeply.

Feeling firmly planted in the landscape.

Hear once again the general mix which is your soundscape, and let all your senses come into play. Open the eyes and smell your surroundings.

Smile if you like, and when ready begin to move… at ease in your environment.

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PRACTICE

TASTE

Too many humans, all needing food, in a volatile, ever-changing world, which they don’t look after…?

Not really a good recipe for peaceful eating!

When such creatures, full of desire and emotion brew alcohol…

Well it doesn’t seem to make for moderate drinking either! 

Food and drink can be such a pleasure, but going by the present state of the nation which I love …

It seems our consumption is doing more harm than good. 

Enough said. Rant over. This website is not about preaching, and likes to focus on the fun and the positive.

So here are some light-hearted reminders of things we can do which make for happy eating, pleasant drinking and good digestion. 

As usual it’s about making a practice out of everyday behaviour. It’s a way of replacing bad habits with good ones using awareness and repetition.

We may not always remember, so it’s best to be more amused than self-critical when we don’t always manage it. The way I think about such things is: I’ll give it a yoga-turn:

STOP TO EAT

Practice not doing anything else while you eat, especially if that’s not the norm.

Turn off the TV. Put down devices. Let any music be quiet and unobtrusive. Let yourself sit peacefully with no distractions.

SIT TO EAT

Be upright and imagine your head floating upwards. Notice any slumping (as if trying to get closer to the food!)

If on a chair, try not leaning on the back of it (especially if it’s shaped like a bucket!) Try not to cross your legs, but have both feet on the floor and if the chair’s too high, put something under the feet.

DON’T RUSH

If you’re a habitual fast eater or drinker this one can be a real challenge… you’ll probably keep forgetting!

Chew the food completely. Put cutlery down between mouthfuls.

TASTE IT

Let the food or drink move around in the mouth before swallowing. If it tastes good, savour it.

A FAVOURABLE SETTING

Try to eat and drink in pleasant and friendly places, and if not alone then in congenial company.

THANKFULNESS

Pause in gratitude before eating and drinking. Thank the cook or provider if possible. Show appreciation.

MOOD

Try to avoid eating and drinking when upset or angry: it can influence our choices and hamper digestion. Notice thoughts as you eat and cultivate pleasant ones.

SNACKING

It’s easy to deceive ourselves about what we consume, and the quantity. “All I’ve had is a cracker…” Yes, but what about the half-inch slice of cheese on it and half a jar of pickle!

Whether through greed or need, some people eat too much, some too little.

If you’re lucky enough to have plenty of food, then it’s just a case of noticing what and when you eat between meals, or during preparation.

TABLE MANNERS

Notice the way you eat, especially when alone. Are you a lazy or messy eater? Eat mindfully, as if in company.

CHOICE

Obviously, some people’s diet is restricted through medical issues.

If we are fortunate enough to select what we consume, then remember to appreciate this freedom.

Why not pause to notice if what we’re about to swallow will nourish or harm us?

There’s always a moral and ethical aspect to food and drink. It’s worth considering what the environmental, human and animal costs are, and how much we value that.

It’s wonderful to be able to enjoy our food and drink. And what fun to be able to treat ourselves and be a bit naughty when it causes no harm!

A personal afterword about my own relations with alcohol:

So far (touch wood!) I’ve managed to avoid the devastation of long-term addiction… because in this area I know I could easily have had problems.

I’m obviously a huge fan of yoga, and it’s for a very good reason. Without wishing to sound dramatic, I do feel that yoga continually saves me.

At some point I realised that yoga’s benign and practical influence was percolating into all aspects of my everyday life, helping me manage myself better, leading to wiser choices. I really do feel that it saves me from a more impetuous self.  KX

 

 

 

 

 

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WAKEY WAKEY


There are times when life seems to take on certain flavours, often evoked by particular sights, sounds, tastes, smells and touch…

Here’s a blog about the senses… our unique senses, through which we experience the world.

These senses are a powerful stimulus for thoughts, feelings, and how we respond to whatever’s happening at the time.

With their help we humans have evolved to be the most dominant, creative, volatile and destructive creatures on the planet – after a few million years!

Our brain lives in its dark closed shell. Signals from the senses are its gateway to beyond. These signals, translated into the common currency of electro-chemical impulses, then permit us to adopt our own individual slant on the world.

Our senses collaborate:

Vision is a whole-body experience.

Touch influences how we see.

Sight informs what we hear, taste and smell.

When trying to remember something, some people reach for their glasses… in fact, I admit, I’ve done it myself! It’s that feeling that somehow seeing more clearly helps us think more clearly.

And whilst I am grateful for my glasses, I do resent having something stuck on my face!

I encourage people to manage without them on the yoga mat… to enjoy a more carefree experience. Make friends with that blurry, fuzzy world!

At home on bright days I like to go spec-less. Or go walking! Otherwise all the bits that need cleaning and dusting are far too apparent in the sunlight…

But my light-hearted way of putting off housework unfortunately mirrors what may in some become a problem – namely, dulling the senses in order to bypass pain, or closing our eyes and ears to things which don’t reinforce our opinions. We thus cheat ourselves of our natural vibrant awareness and impartiality.

Yoga practices can help us appreciate and evolve connections. For example, the way we breathe reflects the way we think and feel… and vice versa.

It’s good to be reminded that what affects one aspect of us will always influence the function of our whole self.

The way we practise on the yoga mat is a good pointer to how we are in general.

And sometimes in classes people wisely close their eyes. Why? To better savour their own experience, rather than be made hungry by what the eye sees – thus avoiding the urge to achieve the shapes that other bodies are making!

We can too easily believe our eyes, even if they tell us that white is black and black is white.

Our senses can drive us to unwise and illogical behaviours, make us susceptible to strange beliefs and superstitions. We humans are prone to bias, to adopting moral stances then bending facts around them.

First impressions don’t always serve us well in the long term, if based solely on how someone looks or sounds that day.

Our senses can trick us when in highly charged or emotional states of mind; when asked to recall situations imagination can easily replace fact.

In yoga misapprehension is called avidya. And a purpose of practice is to see ourselves and others more clearly – to remove the veils of illusion, which yoga names maya.

How easily our senses can deceive!

We sense things as solid, including us, yet all is space and energetic particles.

We sense we are still, yet we’re hurtling through space on a fast-spinning planet.

We sense that the world is flat, just because we can’t see past our noses!

Our collective senses lend us our perception of the world, from which emerges our own unique, individual reality… it’s a miracle!

Yet, like all else in the world, our senses are ever-changing; their quality comes in tides.

As surely as the moon draws the ocean, they will be affected by ill health, negative emotion, fatigue.

Yoga helps us to take care of ourselves, knowing that how we behave will affect the world around us.

Clarity makes us better managers of ourselves… so that our senses can serve, and not enslave us. X

 

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FRUITS

Hello everyone!   And thank you once again for all your wonderful comments. We are both overjoyed and overwhelmed by the number we are getting. Apologies for not being able to respond to each one… there are just so many! They are very very helpful, so please do keep them coming, because they help keep us going in the right direction.

And Happy New Year! It feels so good to get back on that yoga mat after a few weeks break! Hope you can also begin the year by doing the same.

It’s also good to see the snowdrops… to be reminded, on dull winter days, of the coming spring; to remember that we too are part of nature, and that our own quickening endeavours can also ripen into fruits.

It’s obviously of benefit to have some spark and vigour, to feel light-hearted and in natural rhythm with ourselves. Feeling such benefit is certainly a motivation to take up yoga practices. Some benefits are instant, others creep up over time…

Perhaps one day we notice that some once-familiar ache has faded.

Perhaps our general mood is upbeat and we are not so easily dragged down.

Perhaps we feel more buoyant, less anxious, better able to counter daily knocks and scrapes without being thrown off balance.

Benefits can be numerous, coming in fits and starts, and not always apparent;

We might start with tiny steps, but, who knows?… these could become giant leaps! Why not THINK BIG!?

Be optimistic and stretch upwards like the snowdrop – from the cold earth into sunshine, out of darkness into light.

Yes, the benefits can be numerous – it’s better just to suggest a few.

Fruits of practice might make us more…

ACCEPTING… that whilst we may have little control over events, we can still have authority over the self.

Aware that, though our self-determination may be limited, how we react in an encounter will affect the outcome.

ADAPTABLE… better equipped to handle inevitable change – flexing, not snapping under strain.

Better able to weather storms, knowing when to cut losses by pausing mid-stream and changing tack.

Less inclined to let ill-serving ways set in with age.

APPRECIATIVE… and grateful for our unique world and life.

Not taking anyone or anything for granted – knowing that even seemingly mundane things can be most missed when absent.

ATTENTIVE… and mentally present in more of our moments.

Able to focus and become absorbed at will.

Recognising when and why short and poor attention span becomes a problem.

ATTUNED… more able to read and gauge the frame of mind of those around us.

Less likely to over-react. More skilled in how we respond, interact and intersect with the world.

Better at undertaking and completing tasks.

AWARE… wide-awake to experiences – making life seem longer because we spend less time in mental torpor.

Able to optimise and enjoy varying mental states such as absorption, daydream and meditation.

BALANCED… centred.

Better able to navigate a course between conflicting aspects of life; to reconcile what can feel like a wilful battle of thought versus feeling.

Freer of the urge to accumulate, less enslaved by desire or affected by strong emotion, able to let go.

Knowing what helps return us to an even keel when out of kilter – and doing it.

CLEAR-SIGHTED… unafraid to see all, including ourself, in the harsh light of day.

Impartial, less caught up in greedy self-interest.

Able to gauge when our pleasures will lead to pain in the long run.

COMFORTABLE… in our skin, able to make the best of our condition.

Knowing how to help free ourselves from muscular and mental tensions.

Able to think, feel and move with more grace and poise.

COMPASSIONATE… and helpful. Tolerant of others’ shortcomings, because we know how hard it is to recognise and address them in ourselves.

Knowing that if we sometimes find it hard being human, then so might others.

Unafraid to feel the inevitable contrasts that come with being human – and thus acutely aware… pleasure/pain, joy/sorrow, ups/downs.

CONFIDENT… but free from self-righteous arrogance and hubris.

Self-contained, less troubled by how others regard us.

Feeling entirely equal to, but no better or worse than anybody else.

Having less anxiety and doubt, less fear of failure and more courage in endeavour.

CONNECTED… within ourself and to the world.

Realising that what happens to one part of a living system affects its whole function; our actions will influence those around us, the effect spreading like ripples in water.

Able to link thoughts and feelings with consequent behaviour, and vice versa.

COURAGEOUS… able to face our fears, take responsibility in situations and rise to occasions.

Less prone to social pressure to conform, but living in a way that reflects our own values.

ENERGISED…vigorous.

In rhythm with natural cycles.

Able to optimise, direct and conserve energy, with less time spent in fruitless worry, and less holding on to tensions which can lead to ill health.

More buoyant, less drained by negativity when feeling under par.

FITTER… as healthy as we can be, because we feel inclined to desire and do what helps keep us fit and well.

FREE… whatever our situation, enjoying a sense of liberty that comes from being a more well-managed person.

Free of self-deception.

Able to make the best of what we are born with and into.

Having free will to react and respond wisely to daily challenges, hardships, harshness and critical situations.

FULFILLED… by how we live from day to day.

Living in a manner that suits our nature.

Able to distil maximum pleasure from everyday occurrences – making the most of life.

Living more in the present, yearning less for the future, dwelling less in the past.

GENEROUS… by default!

Having less self-interest, which frees us from the urge to control and accumulate.

More impartial, freeing us from jealousy and bitterness.

Able to share resources, even when limited.

Interested in the lives and welfare of others.

HAPPY… as a naturally regained default setting.

Able to enjoy sensory and sexual pleasures without doing harm.

Content to live by what will nourish us and help us to thrive.

Steadier – free from excessive moods and self-destructive tendencies which debilitate and drain.

Finding pleasure in others’ joys and fortunes.

More optimistic in general outlook.

HARMONIOUS…with less internal conflict, more sense of personal space.

Easily regaining a state of mental equilibrium.

A benign influence and a greater force for good in the world.

HUMBLE… modest.

At ease feeling simply one of many.

Comfortable knowing that life is transient.

Free of the self-righteous belief that ‘our way’ is right and others are wrong.

INSPIRED… creative, imaginative, deductive.

Inspiring others by example.

Finding that good ideas come unbidden into the mind, as if from nowhere.

Undertaking and completing tasks with more ease and less effort.

INTUITIVE… with emotional intelligence, better able to gauge and read ourselves and others.

Interpreting situations more wisely, better able to anticipate outcomes.

Having a feel for what is good and right.

KIND… feeling less fear and anxiety, leading to a kindlier life. Tender and never knowingly cruel.

LIGHT-HEARTED… inclined to take oneself less seriously.

Easily made to laugh or smile.

Having a lightness of spirit that uplifts us and helps others through darker times.

OPEN-MINDED… and open-hearted.

Not closed to wonder, new ideas, transformative experiences.

Believing that all kinds make our rich and diverse world – that mono-systems, without interaction, unaccepting of change, lead to a world which cannot thrive.

PERCEPTIVE… skilful in daily living – more judicious, fair, discerning and considered.

REFRESHED… benefitting from proper rest; busy, but with less frantic haste and stress.

Enjoying restorative habits.

Allowing oneself the time and space for plenty of pauses in daily action… stopping to breathe, to take stock, to notice life.

Viewing each day as a new opportunity.

RESPONSIBLE… accountable for our actions.

Self-reliant – but a good receiver.

Seeing when troubles are of our own making – not blaming others when a fault is ours.

Able to link thoughts and feelings with consequent behaviour, so we act more responsibly.

WISER… learning from daily experience.

Making choices which lead to better outcomes.

Less likely to repeat the same mistakes over and over.

More focussed on the greater rather than the personal good.

More inclined to be well-managed, happy, benevolent.

Enjoying a sense of ease in the self, with room to breathe and think and move, making space for our natural wiser self to emerge.

 

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SPLENDID REMINDER

Right now, Spring seems a long way off. The winter has made itself known. We’ve had snow, ice, rainy days and many early morning frosts. As I write this I am berating myself for being so ‘narrow minded’ for not noticing these gorgeous scenes. We have some of the most beautiful sun rises. The crisp and fresh days walking in the park is a sheer delight. The berries on the trees are at their best.

There’s no doubt that when the spring arrives it will be very welcome. However, I’m giving myself a nudge to remind myself of the splendour of all the ordinary things that are all around us here in this present moment. I don’t want to wish the days away, I want to notice what’s good in the here and now. In fact it’s the only thing that is a real certainty. A moveable feast of splendid moments – If we choose to recognise them as such.

The image used for this blog illustrates the point perfectly. Taken by my lovely friend Anne, looking through the window at the dark, winter evening of busy traffic. Just notice the colours, the contrast, the energy, and the cosiness of being in the warm and dry on the other side of the window.

We see things like this every day and let them pass by without a thought. No point in wondering what I’ve missed today – there will be so much more to see tomorrow.

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SEASON’S GREETINGS

Well it’s been quite a season. So busy ! Full of work, yoga, website stuff….. and life – getting along with things has been both challenging and rewarding in equal measure.

Respect and love to all of you who have read and commented on our blogs. Your responses have meant so much to us and are so appreciated. Those of you who have English as a second language deserve special thanks for your efforts.

Some of your comments may not be visible to you at the moment. If you can’t see yours, please be patient. There are so many that it’s going to take time to get to them all. We will get there eventually.   Massive apologies for not replying to each of you individually but there aren’t enough hours in each day. Please be assured, they are all read. We just can’t tell you how much your input and support means to us.

For those of you who celebrate Christmas – Merry Christmas to you. For those who don’t, we hope you have a wonderful winter festive season. Stay safe and warm with your families and friends and share your love and kindness with all those who deserve it – and maybe those who don’t!

Kit and I live in an area of in the North West of England where there is a huge diversity of cultures, all of which enrich our lives and create a better place for us to live in and give us a greater understanding of the world outside our little ‘Burnley Bubble’.  Our tolerance and acceptance of differences can only help to make the world a better place to be in.

Much love and best wishes for a prosperous, peaceful and happy new year.

For the locals, we will be starting a new weekly yoga class on the 18th January at The Exchange Project (St Johns in Colne) 6 pm. Come and join us if you can. We would love to see you and share a little yoga. All are welcome.

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PRACTICE

A RED DOT STOP PRACTICE TO THINK OF SOMEONE

For an introduction to STOP PRACTICES see Kit’s blog-STARTING TO STOP.

This practical reminder helps us to stop being wrapped up in our own needs and desires.

It’s an exercise in unselfishness: since, like our bodies, such things improve by regular use.

It involves stopping to call someone to mind.

It could be more than one person; perhaps a family, household, establishment, community or town. It could even be a whole nation or race. 

It could be a person or people you’re feeling estranged from. Someone you have difficulty liking or getting along with. Someone perhaps who is causing you problems.

The practice can change how you feel about them, and help how you respond the next time you meet. 

It could be a person or people for whom the day is significant. Perhaps a day of celebration or particular challenge. Perhaps they’re sick or just having a hard time. 

To effect these stops, the practice uses the Red Dot method: 

Put a dot on the palm of your hand with indelible ink. Whenever you notice the dot, pause for a few breaths. 

The dot could be on either palm… try it both ways. Seeing one palm too frequently may not help the practice – it’s for you to decide. 

The dot can be any colour; I use red because of its association with traffic lights. 

It’s helpful to decide the subject/subjects of your practice beforehand.

This allows you to proceed without too much extra thinking. 

Read the practice through a few times, perhaps before sleeping and again in the morning, with a view to practising it over the coming day.

Soak up what you remember and make it your own.

The Practice

When you notice the dot, pause from action for a few breaths.

Drop the shoulders. Relax the face and back of neck.

Notice your breath. Let your exhales soften and your inhales deepen.

Call an image of your subject/subjects to your mind’s eye. Imagine looking down upon them from the sky.

You might even picture them clearly in a particular location if you know what they’re doing at that time.

Say their name in your head or voice it softly.

Take some deep and easy breaths.

Imagine a white healing light all around you.

As with love and compassion, the light is inexhaustible… not like some commodity which when used up is then unavailable. It existed before humanity and will remain afterwards. If we’re lucky we can have it and use it.

Draw in the light through your breath and your skin.

Feel it soak into every space, molecule and atom.

Feel that the light is enlivening you.

Now direct it to them.

Imagine them healed by the light. Imagine it guiding and helping their day.

Along with the light, send well wishes and good intentions.

You too have experienced this healing power of light.

Become aware of your surroundings. Feel yourself firmly rooted in your landscape.

Look around. Notice sounds.

And when you’re ready, resume action and move on.

OTHER STOP PRACTICES

A red dot stop practice to improve present state of mind

A red dot stop practice to look around

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PRACTICE

UPON WAKING

A powerful tool for improving mental state, this practice helps nip things in the bud before the day gets going.

Cultivating the skill of watching how we waken helps us gauge our mood more easily. It’s like a reset button to help improve how we respond during the coming day, whatever happens.

Being able to step back from knee-jerk over-reactions is liberating.

Feeling we have room to move helps us see that we have choices.

Feeling we have room to breathe helps keep our centre calm to help weather life’s storms.

Notes on practice

This is a practice done in bed before rising. It’s a useful habit to cultivate.

It can be easily adapted to last only moments or be extended into minutes.

Like other practices, it’s simple, but not easy to apply. It’s easy to wander off in thought or daydream, or in this case to fall back into sleep!

The practice makes a number of suggestions – just take up whatever’s useful and make it your own

The Practice

Become aware of being awake.

Resist the urge to move just yet. Let the eyes stay closed.

Allow yourself this pause to mark the moments when sleep is ending and consciousness begins.

Note the position of your body as it wakens.

Become aware of having hands and limbs. Softly gaze into the backs of your eyelids.

Slowly roll over onto the back if you’re not like that already. If the back likes it, bend the legs at the knees.

Following these first stirrings of your day, settle again and let the hands rest.

Become aware of the body breathing. Sense its movement as you breathe.

Have the tongue on the roof of the mouth. Letting it lift at the back helps the mouth stay closed.

Sense air at the nostrils; follow it moving out, and then in.

Let the exhales soften and the inhales lengthen.

Recall any significant dreams. Take them in so you can revisit them later.

Notice how thoughts and feelings arrive.

Rest the hands on the belly if that feels ok. Let the exhales be calm so they steady the breathing.

Allow the belly to relax. Enjoy the movement of the breathing.

Become aware of facial expression. Let your eyes stay closed, but imagine them smiling, whatever your mood.

Notice the manner and rhythm of the breath. Let the inhales deepen.

Breathe into every nook and cranny. Feel the entire body being breathed.

Imagine the breath as a healing white light. Draw it deeply in. Let it soak into tissues, cells, molecules.

Your body of light is energised, more than enough for the day… and this energy will not drain away through contact with people and the world.

Consider the day and the date and whether it’s significant in any way.

Imagine yourself in the places today where you expect to be. Picture yourself interacting well and feeling at ease.

Picture yourself being perceptive, responding wisely, taking interest in others… making good decisions.

Call to mind anyone for whom this day is significant. Imagine them bathed in their healing white light.

Call to mind in turn any of your best-beloved. Picture them where you think they might be – also bathed in their healing light-energy.

Call to mind anyone causing you problems, or from whom you’re estranged. Send them some light. Feel any anger or resentment melt from your belly. Imagine yourself not the least bit defensive the next time you meet.

Return to the breath at your nostrils. Inhale a sense of physical and mental space – space to move with comfort and ease; breathing space; lots of room to think clearly.

Inhale what could serve you well, such as courage, joy, vitality.

If your heart feels heavy, imagine it lighter.

Exhale any feelings of nervous apprehension about the day ahead.

Feel ready to be a good receiver.

When it’s time to move, enliven your senses. Hear any sounds around… those close by, then those further away.

Feel a surge of energy as you open your eyes. You’re now ready to rise and get to grips with the day!

Click here to read RAISE YOUR DAY blog

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RAISE YOUR DAY

Begin your day well with one of our practices, such as the one that’s called “UPON WAKING ” – which you do without even getting out of bed!

“Music will raise your day”, I once heard a radio presenter say.

“What a lark! What a plunge!”… exclaims one of my favourite characters, Virginia Woolf’s youthful Mrs Dalloway, as she throws open the French windows and plunges into the morning.

Sometimes these two expressions are my first waking thoughts.

Sometimes I wake up with a real sense of responsibility… literally. But it’s not such a bad awakening, in fact I’m grateful for the reminder – that whatever the day brings, what really counts is my own response.

We are not in control of our destiny or of other people. The only person I can endeavour to manage is me. And so my yoga practices and a sense of humour continually come to my rescue. They show me how to better manage myself… from the very start of each fresh new day. I like to think this way. Even when life feels daunting, it still seems exciting. My day can go either way – raised or ruined – depending on what I think, do and say.

Joy says there’s not enough silliness in the world, and I agree. I like trying to lighten my heart whatever is happening. I like to try and raise my days, then maybe if I’m lucky, to help others raise theirs along the way.

It’s easy to get out of bed the wrong way and proceed like that through the course of a day. Doing a practice upon waking helps nip things in the bud before the day gets going – especially if we wake up apprehensive and nervous, with the feeling that storm clouds are looming.

It’s helpful to be light-hearted, whatever is happening around us.

It can be helpful not to take ourselves too seriously – even if this takes conscious practice. This helps us see ourselves more clearly – so we can better manage our responses, allowing us choices.

It’s so very easy to be miserable – a positive choice can make the difference between a raised or ruined day.

Click here to read UPON WAKING practice

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CLOUD GAZING

This week has been a fabulous week for the beautiful weather here in the North West. We’ve been able to enjoy clear blue skies and sunshine – what a treat!

It never lasts for too long though. On the bright side, every cloud……… and all that.

Clouds can be spectacular. Playing out in the garden, dreamily staring up into the clouds takes me back to childhood. I would often lay staring at the sky watching the clouds form animal shapes, only to then see them floating away and forming something else in its place.

The shapes are long forgotten and those summer days long gone. What remains is the feeling of elation and fun when I repeat this childish act and see a new cloud animal forming in the sky. I am that child again!

What a special and treasured feeling. It reminds me that I need not take myself so seriously all the time.

Today the clouds are moving so swiftly I hardly have time to see things before they are blown away into oblivion…….I’m off, can’t stop in case I miss something wonderful in that big old sky of ours!!

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LESS IS MORE

I have been practicing yoga for 42 years and am still amazed by the moves I can get my body into – or not! Throughout the journey of learning and experimenting I have come to realise that the more advanced yoga is how little I need to do for the benefit it can bring.

I often tell my students, ‘Do less – it’s more advanced’ but I’m not sure they believe me. Let’s be honest, why would they. The media is full of ‘extreme yoga’ – shapes to put the body into, asanas to impress. Yoga isn’t about that. For me it’s self-enquiry, introspective inspection, intentional movement and the binding of the movement with the breath – the very stuff of life.

One of my favourite quotes from Housman, ‘The stuff of life to knit me blew hither, here I am’ One clever dude! He was right. We are a product of our environment, experiences, influences and activities. They make us what we are. Let’s recognise it and take pleasure from the knowledge. The self-enquiry from this gives us the insight to enjoy or make changes to the here and now – whether on the mat or observing ourselves as we go about our daily business.

David Beckham sings the praises of Shona virtue, superstar yoga teacher and his personal trainer. I agree with her view that the high intensity training and sweaty gym sessions do more to stress the body than improve the well-being of the mind or body – both are inextricably linked. One really won’t improve without the other. We need to increase our dopamine and serotonin levels and decrease our cortisol levels. In our speak – feel better and less stressed. The best yoga teachers allow you to find the right moves to help you to balance these neurotransmitters and hormones in your own body rather than impress you with the shapes they can get themselves into. I’m not sure that’s even yoga at all!

For me, yoga is a lifestyle. We are deluding ourselves if we think that an hour a week at the local class will transform our body and our lives, however it’s a start and if we treat our bodies with the respect they deserve by eating well and living well, we can at least contribute to the well-being we would like to achieve.

It takes me back to my eternal message of ‘let’s enjoy the journey’ – forget the goals and the end game and take each moment for what it give us and enjoy that ordinary splendour. It’s what it’s all about.

 

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CHANGE

I’m on my annual summer holiday, sitting by the pool and observing how me and my family respond to change of environment and how we react negatively or positively to it. Personally I have been smiling and laughing at all the new things I have witnessed and experienced, such as different food, wine and surroundings – but the two men in my life, Simon, my husband and Henry, my son, have been grumpy and I think a little distressed by the changes. What was expected I wonder? New country, new food, new surroundings!! Was it a shock to the system or just the reluctance to accept anything new? I’m guessing both. Looking for things to be unhappy about , like the air con. not working – it is now after less than 24 hours of being here and being offered alternative accommodation for the first night to compensate – all perfectly reasonable and acceptable!!

So here we are by the pool and I am reflecting happily that the plane didn’t crash and I am enjoying the company of the local feline population after giving them all of Henry’s pork – on the strength that they need it more than he does!

I’ve just read an article in the Telegragh by Jim Khalili where he states that ‘all TV documentary makers are obsessed with journeys’. Well, sorry Jim, so am I. Who cares about the end game / the destination? The journey takes as long as it takes, leads us to our conclusions, feeds our desires and let’s face it, we can’t get there without the journey. It reminds me of a conversation with my son last week, an academic genius (biased mum view of course) unsure about his future. He looked shocked when I said ‘forget the end game and worry about enjoying the journey as that’s most certainly the best bit’. The inadvertent message all his life has been – we expect you to do well because you’re clever – such pressure! In truth, it doesn’t matter what he does as long as it fulfils his needs, puts food on his table, pays his rent and most importantly, he can enjoy the lifestyle he has chosen for himself. In my view he is lucky to have the choice. He has travelled the world to date with his most recent employment and is now looking to fulfil other needs in his life.

Do we seek the pleasure or task… or does it choose us? I don’t know. I do know however, that acceptance of change or lack of it makes a difference to how we view the world and our lives. Our positive experiences allow us the ability to accept and embrace change for what it is so we can enjoy the journey and all it brings. Or we don’t accept and let the negativity get the better of us, causing us to withdraw and maybe feel a little disappointed or afraid. The small shift in perspective allows us some discernment and power to choose what we do along the way.

Our goals and expectations can mislead and distract us from the pleasure of everyday, taking those everyday splendours of the small things in life, or rejecting the very small pleasures that make the journey of life worth living. Visit the lifestyle website of our friend Sarah who explores the extraordinary chaos of everyday family life and enjoys every moment it has to offer.

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BED YOGA !

It’s summer! It’s morning! I’m refreshed after a good night’s sleep. I was soon off last night with the fresh air of the wide open window and a session of yoga nidra and relaxation yesterday evening – my eyes were already heavy when my head hit the pillow.

This morning they opened lazily as the breeze stroked my face and the birds were entertaining with their usual dawn chorus. My body wanted to move but it felt too soon to get up and on with the day. Yoga was on my mind so I began shuffling around under the covers.

The shuffling morphed into lengthening, the lengthening morphed into curling, the breath turned softer and longer as the movement became fluid as the body reacted to each subtle change.

It became a morning practice on the bed which was so softly supportive.

I hit the day for real with a renewed calm disposition which stayed with me for the rest of the day.

Have a go next time you wake early and feel it’s too soon for the day to start.

Happy bed yoga-ing!!!!   Is that a word…….?

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OUR ARTICLES

ON WALKING

Our bodies are made for movement, which benefits all the physical systems; if lacking, we suffer greatly by its absence.

Not having to walk everywhere, especially when laden, is a labour-saving luxury of modern living – and too easily taken for granted. The benefit can also be a deprivation, robbing us of the free joy of walking as part of everyday life. This is an especial pleasure when hands-free, comfortably shod and without the pressure of rushing. Walking in fresh country air is a tonic, but an urban walk can still help blow the cobwebs away, if the air quality is half decent.

We can tell a lot by someone’s way of walking, it advertises their condition and frame of mind. What we were born like, what’s happened to us since, and how we are now, are all distilled into our present gait; and this in turn is setting patterns for how easily we will be moving in the future.

Mind-set is a major influence on a person’s ease of movement and bearing; affecting their whole self – how they breathe, how they hold muscular tension, their attitude and interactions with the world around them, and how they feel about themselves.

Conversely, as mental state influences manner of movement, so does that moving affect mental state – for better or for worse. So we all have the ability to influence how we feel by the way that we move, and vice versa.

A spring in the step helps improve the mood, whereas nothing positive will come of shuffling about in a state of collapse.

Awareness, attitude and lifestyle reflect on how we move. It’s unfortunately too common now for a person’s variety of movement to become more restricted with age. Consider the effect of taking very little exercise and sitting around too much – basically moving from bed to car to office to car to sofa and back to bed again for too many years.

If a body no longer moves in diverse ways it will soon forget how to, will no longer be able to. Then, tragically, the rich joy of free movement may remain at best a vague and elusive childhood memory.

Observation of many yoga practitioners confirms that the older person can move with the flourish and vitality of a child. Thankfully, subliminal lost movement can be restored, through conscious practice, till once again it becomes intuitive.

Mental state affects wellness. A positive person with physical restrictions can be more comfortable in their skin than one at peak fitness but with a gloomy state of mind.

One becomes as one repeatedly does. Habits, better or worse, can be easier to spot in others than in our own self. The gait speaks volumes. A mincing one may be consciously cultivated to present a character to the world, as may be the jaunty, athletic one, giving the impression of someone who takes life in their stride. The heaviness of a footfall is also revealing; so too is the pattern of wear on someone’s shoes.

A more attuned awareness helps us see the direction we, and others, are heading in. Many do have mobility problems by early adulthood; all the more tragic when earlier recognition could have helped prevent serious health issues.

Many people don’t actually like their feet, and many do unwittingly wear shoes which are too small, so the feet become accustomed to their discomfort. Footwear is obviously a brilliant invention which has had a massive positive impact on our success as a species; but apparently our modern feet are too dependent on our shoes. It seems that human feet are generally becoming more mobile but not as strong; we no longer have the bounce and find it harder to do without our shoes. Lack of variety in the surfaces we walk on also doesn’t help – floors, pavements, too much time in heels and too little time spent barefoot.

It‘s easy to blame the feet, rather than the way we are using them. What we do with one part always influences the function of the whole – a problem toe may cause us to walk badly which puts pressure on the leg and hurts the knee, our lopsided gait leads to a problem hip which causes back pain, then having to leave a job we love, depression sets in and things are not looking good – all because of one problem toe!

Appreciating the importance of how we walk is power in our hands. Positive change may take some time, or come to us in an instant.

A walk may be a mindless rush, with the major focus on getting somewhere. But we do have a choice, and this can determine our condition upon arrival.

 

Kit Hartley. Lidgett. May 2017

SEE A WALKING PRACTICE

 

 

 

 

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OUR ARTICLES

ON PAUSING

Life without pause is not a life worth living.

To pause is such a simple thing – regularly done it becomes apparent that pausing is an integral part of harmonious human living.

Pausing before action is the basis of awareness. A split-second pause might be enough to inspire life-saving reaction, to let simple easy solutions spring up suddenly as if from nowhere.

A pause could stop a person in their tracks – before they say or do something later regretted.

To be able to dash about enjoying a busy life is a wonderful thing, not to be taken for granted. But being busy does not make a life more meaningful.

Busy-ness is not the same as fulfilment or accomplishment.

Compulsive repetition of unnecessary tasks does indeed become an obsession for some people; even moderate habits can grow into problems.

A pause can lend more skill to thought and action, so that more of our choices serve us well.

Does keeping busy make people feel more useful?

Perhaps fear of seeing too clearly can make us steer us away from opportunities for solitary reflection.

Encountering our thoughts can sometimes be a frightening thing – the unfortunate, mind-numbing remedy being to deny ourselves the space to stop and think.

It’s very easy to preoccupy our minds with many things clutter. We can miss many fleeting present moments dwelling on the future or the past, or occupied in thoughtless tasks.

A pause is a space to rest and evaluate, to slow us down or rouse us from a slothful state. A sense of inertia can keep us moving steadily, unthinkingly on, in the same unwise direction… or it can stop us getting up to move altogether.

Our pauses are as natural as breathing, but like proper breathing are easily sacrificed to the unwelcome pressures of daily life. Lack of pause not only compromises perceptive awareness of what is happening around us – it robs us of opportunities to absorb the daily wonder which surrounds us and links us to the living world.

This is such an exciting time to live! Fast changes in technology keep us all on our toes and tenterhooks; tech devices are now so much part of daily action that we can hardly imagine life without them. We can access things rapidly by the click of a key. Data tracks us and seems to know our preferences. Huge effort is made by manufacturers and service providers to make their products seem irresistible – thus keeping us hooked.

We can access vast amounts of digital information, but nothing is quite the same as the mentorship of human contact. Too much time and energy spent on devices reduces our ability to form meaningful relationships – it’s just plain common sense to see that this is the case. If we are not selective in using technology we risk becoming disconnected from ourselves as well as each other.

Problems with short and poor quality attention span can be offset by simply stopping to notice what is happening, allowing time enough to restfully sit and focus on nothing very much. Pauses and daydreams are a welcome default mode for the brain. Lulls or short rests give us time to absorb or reflect. They can provide insight and lend greater ease to everyday tasks. If the lack of pause starts to show then we need to expose ourselves to the chance of it, until it becomes an intuitive part of daily life.

The more I teach yoga, the more apparent it becomes that too many of us are frazzled!

A healthy level of stress is a natural part of life, it gets us up and moving to satisfy urges such as hunger –but prolonged periods in a stressful state are damaging. Sadly this is far too common, and it makes people ill. Chronic stress can too easily become a familiar companion, so that we grow into our tempers, stoops and frowns.

Conscious and regular pause helps us become more self-attuned. Taking better notice helps us respond to the multiple stresses that we face on a daily basis. We can grow stronger, flexing rather than snapping under strain.

Why be afraid to pause, to step back, to see a brighter, bigger picture?

For this can only help us to make wiser decisions, to choose paths which serve us better. And it allows space for our less fearful, more impartial, more benevolent self to emerge, positively influencing behaviour and showing ourselves and others in a more kindly and compassionate light.

 

Kit Hartley.   Lidgett. May 2017

 

SEE PAUSE, CONSIDER, ENJOY

 

 

 

 

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PRACTICE

A BREATHING PRACTICE

A practice for breath awareness:

Find a comfy warm spot.

Lay on the mat in Savasana (flat on the floor) – you may prefer to sit – you may prefer to try this lying in bed.

Begin by taking the attention to the breath and the heartbeat.

Take a moment to arrive in the space you are in.

This action – or lack of it – may be enough to aid your calming and relaxation process. If that’s the case, don’t search for more. Be happy that you are in a good place in the mind and body.

Become more aware of the breath and inhale gently and softly through the nose. Allow the outbreath to be equally as long as the inhale – or maybe a little longer if that feels comfortable for you.

It can be useful to breathe in to the count of 3 and out to the count of 3. This helps to focus the mind on the breath and away from external distractions. If you become uncomfortable, return to your free and normal breath at any time.

Next notice where you are breathing – in the chest – the belly?

Try directing it consciously first to the belly then the chest. Notice how the belly expands, and how the movement creates subtle movements of the hips in their sockets, or the gentle tilt of the pelvis. If you are holding tension in these areas the movements may not be happening.

Take the awareness and focus to these areas and try to relax as you exhale. With a little patience and practice these movements will become apparent as you tune in to the body.

Notice when the chest expands how the ribs lift and widen and how the shoulders are able to move in the joints.

This is the body’s natural way of creating space and movement in the joints and is perfectly normal. Observe a young child or baby as they are sleeping – young enough not to have learned the sensation of holding tension or subconscious restricting habits.   You may be able to recreate this special free breath in your own practice.

When you feel comfortable with this gentle breathing you will be able to do it anywhere and use it for your own wellbeing and relaxation. 5 or 10 minutes every day will have you doing this without having to think about it.

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A 10 MINUTE REST

 

 

This is also a podcast.  (To listen, click on the arrow above). Read it through a few times imagining you are at rest – it will help the suggestions soak in.

Use the practice as a prelude to sleep or to help quell anxiety if you’re having difficulty sleeping.

Also try the practice as an energiser during the day by permitting yourself time out, even just a few minutes, to take a rest.

Unless you’re already in bed, an easy chair with leg support is fine; or lie on the back, feet apart, palms uppermost. If the lower back complains – put a pillow under the knees.

The practice:

If tense once in position, stretch and yawn.

Let eyes relax and close; begin to settle.

Softly gaze into the back of your eyelids – notice what you see.

Become aware of your hands, keep noticing them.

Let the mouth softly close.

Place the tongue in the roof of the mouth. Let it lift at the back – it will help you keep the mouth closed and breathe through the nose.

Sense the breath at the nostrils, follow the air moving out… moving in.

Imagine more space for the air… in the chest, in the throat, and the bridge of your nose, for the lungs to breathe.

Notice the manner and rhythm of your breathing.

Allow the out-breaths to soften; feel them lengthen as they soften. Let the inhales and exhales be of similar length.

Take a few big… deep… breaths.

Open the mouth and sigh out the exhales. Do a few more of these, and imagine any worries or muscular tensions melting away along with those out-breaths.

Have the mouth softly close again, and breathe through your nose.

Now let go of your breath to notice other things.

Become aware of the expression on your face – imagine that your eyes are smiling.

Give yourself permission to be light-hearted and do nothing except lie there relaxing.

Feel face muscles releasing – no frown or hard line between the lips.

Let any tightness in the back of the neck melt away.

Allow the shoulders to let go of the arms.

Remind any tightness in the legs to release.

Feel your pelvis settle heavily; imagine it widening, as if to make more room inside for your abdomen.

With every out-breath let any hardness soften.

Sense your weight releasing down and enjoy the ground rising up to support it.

Be a good receiver of that ground underneath, and feel the weight of your body melt into it.

When thoughts come, just notice what they are – like clouds drifting across your mental sky.

When thoughts come… imagine them flying off like a flock of birds.

When thoughts come… imagine saving them for later.

Simply lie there and feel your body breathing and relaxing.

Imagine yourself being bathed in kindly white light.

When distractions come notice your hands and what you see with your eyes closed, and the softness of your breathing.

Focus on these simple things so that all the other stuff of life can melt away for a while.

And now allow your breath to softly deepen.

Feel that you can inhale whatever serves you well now – such as joy, peace, health, vitality… and let go with your exhales of negative things.

Breathe a feeling of more physical and mental space – space to think clearly and move with vitality when you get up, or the space to fall asleep and let go.

Listen to the 10 minute guided resting practice by pressing the arrow below.

 

 

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BLOG

BEST FOOT FORWARD

Let’s get straight to the point. What I’m thinking is… throw the shoes to the back of the cupboard!! ‘Have I lost my senses?’   Maybe I have, or maybe I’ve just gone to sleep. Let me explain…

Consider what it feels like when you cover your ears, they don’t work properly, the sound is muffled. In other words the sense of hearing is dulled and the sensitivity is lost.

Imagine the same scenario with your feet. Put on a lovely comfortable pair of supportive shoes. The result is the feet are so cosy they go to sleep. They have nothing to do, no ground to feel, no heat or cold sensation. In other words, they’ve stopped having to bother. We may even work harder to search for sensation by stamping or hitting the ground harder in order to compensate. This can have the knock-on effect of creating tension or damage in the joints.

SET THEM FREE!

Kick off the shoes and socks, walk along that lovely shag pile that cost a fortune. Let the wool tickle the toes. As the feet feel what is beneath them, enquire where the weight is. Feel the toes spread as the weight shifts to the front of the feet. Feel how much they are able to bend when there are no shoes to stop them.

Take it to the beach for the wow factor or walk on the early morning dewy grass before breakfast. This will wake up the feet and let them feel again.

Clearly it would be poor advice to say no to footwear completely. It’s obviously not a good look with the interview outfit or at the busy shopping centre. We need to be aware of the hidden dangers of walking on unsuitable surfaces or being hurt by sharp objects. Let’s do it when we can. There’s nothing like the feeling of the ground beneath the feet or feeling the earth rise up to meet us as we walk. So feel your feet on the ground and let the floor be your friend.

 

(Inspired by my deliciously very touchy feely feet and an article I listened to by Leslie Kaminof)

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OUR ARTICLES

ON STANDING

In a volatile world the successful species are those who can evolve fast enough to continue thriving in a changing environment.

Beside the long age of earth our own species is still very young. The human primate has evolved in a short space of time, through the merit of adaptability, to become the planet’s most creative and most destructive inhabitant.

We now stand erect on hind legs, balancing our large-brained heads, able to manually grip by virtue of long, opposing thumbs.

At peak, we humans are astounding. But looking around at each other now…

How well is our species? Are we thriving?

The protection lent by footwear and clothing has revolutionised what humans can do.

But not being barefoot, and over-reliance on the support of shoes, has robbed the feet of their natural spring-power and strength.

Too much walking on hard, flat, urban floors has left us less able to cope with mixed outdoor terrain.

Gravity keeps us rooted to the fast-spinning planet. Its force pulls us down whilst we then spring upwards like plants into sunlight. But this beneficial, grounding force does not always seem good; the head may feel a heavy burden for the upright spine, the body a weight to be dragged around. And with too much chronic strain life is not lived so well.

At such times, how one thinks, breathes and moves simply gets in the way of the natural well self.

Living bones are light, but when rightly used can have the strength of reinforced concrete.

One’s weight is easily borne when fit and well.

Bones do not just resist vertical pressure well – they actually benefit from it.

Shock-absorbing discs between spinal vertebrae help counter compression.

We are tallest in the mornings after a night’s rest, becoming shorter through the day.

Moisture loss from discs over the course of the day shortens the spine. A night’s rest gives time for thirsty discs to reabsorb this moisture.

Splendid rich movement in the course of the day gives additional restoration, plumping the discs up again.

Variety of movement and adequate rest reflect the ease or unease we then have in standing for any length of time.

A well, able-bodied person can easily balance, with effortless poise, the head’s weight on the top of the spine.

The spine’s curves are a spring for bouncing back – but with too much hardship in life these curves can develop too much or too little to give adequate support.

Without the spring in our step we are no longer able to absorb the shock of anything more than restricted basic movements.

How well we are becomes apparent when just standing still.

Our phenomenal body-mind can feel vibrant and vital, grounded but weightless, flexible and strong.

The spine is our tower of strength. When it isn’t, our freedom has gone.

 

SEE STANDING PRACTICE

 

 

Kit Hartley.   Lidgett.   May 2017

 

 

 

 

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PRACTICE

A WALKING PRACTICE

This is a practical reminder, to help you notice how the way you walk affects the way you feel. We aim to also shortly make it available as a podcast.

As this practice is written and we can’t read whilst walking, please read it a few times beforehand, and imagine you are walking, so that the suggestions soak in.

The more we practise, the more benefits we feel. So consider even a short walk as an opportunity; the benefits will gradually soak in until it no longer feels like a practice.

If possible be unburdened, except perhaps for a moderate backpack.

For the first few times, alone is best.

Switch off or leave behind mobile devices.

Be in comfortable footwear.

Be outdoors, hopefully in clean air – though large indoor spaces are also suitable.

Remember to appreciate the ability, and the liberty, to walk.

The Practice

Recognise small opportunities to practise.

Look around as you walk and take in your surroundings.

Pay attention to walking safely, so as to avoid collisions and trips.

Set a moderate pace which allows easy breathing through the nose. Let the mouth softly close.

Stretch the hands as if newly released from tight gloves – then let them relax.

Allow the shoulders to soften, and let go of your arms.

Feel the head releasing upwards as though weightless; let the neck be free of tension.

Let your powerful feet press down; allow their spring to push you forward.

Sense the length of your legs as you enjoy their movement. Resist any habit of tightening the ankles, or of walking from the knees.

Become aware of your breathing. Let your exhales soften.

Feel the breath in your back; follow it out, follow it in.

Imagine the whole of your body being breathed.

Stay aware of your surroundings whilst walking alone. (!) Let ears listen whilst relaxed eyes scan.

Notice the expression on your face – if it’s tight, let it relax.

Can the line between your lips feel soft? Imagine your eyes smiling. Let any frown or furrowed brow melt away.

If the shoulders and neck tighten up, let them go again.

If unwanted tightness or thoughts creep in, imagine them dissolving with your out-breaths.

When walking uphill, put more spring into your step, and push down with your feet. Then imagine your head leading you up and forward.

If outdoors, take in signs of the season, the quality of the light, particular smells and sounds.

Notice your reaction to changes in the weather or to sudden noise – do you tend to over-react, or to hunch up against the cold?

Counter heaviness or lack of energy by feeling more purposeful.

Try quickening your pace, perhaps varying the length of your steps. Discover what you can do to feel more at ease.

Be playful, lighten your heart, be glad not to take life too seriously. So that’s why children skip! Try it yourself, or break into a run.

Remember, this awareness in walking affects how you think and feel. It can change you! Make a positive choice to enjoy and use this power.

From time to time, stop… allow yourself pause. Do nothing. Notice how you feel. Look up at the sky!

Returning to your normal stride, with an easy breath, set a comfortable pace and rhythm.

Avoid rushing, and the urge to simply arrive.

Be open to the idea of receiving the things which come along for free!

When you encounter others, see them in a kindly light, knowing that how they have sat, stood or moved will affect how well they think and feel.

Remember that it costs nothing to smile at strangers.

Continue to focus on these simple things; welcome this breathing space that allows less helpful thoughts to slip away.

Notice how you feel as the practice winds down, and you arrive somewhere. Hopefully you will want to hone these skills by repetition in the future.

And, last but not least, appreciate your fortune that you are able and free to walk.

 

SEE ARTICLE ON WALKING

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